Seabass’ Diary… Day 155…Prince of Darkness

You didn’t think I forgot to write this post, did you? ūüôā I’ve been saving it for Black Cat Appreciation Day which is today; Talk about a great way to celebrate with my black, house panther Seabass and his diary of adventure!

August 17, 2017-I stared at Simba for a second and waited for the sound of footsteps thudding down the staircase to cease; I had to be sure that Amelia wasn’t returning.

I counted to ten and then blew out a sigh, “This is insanity!” I shouted. “We are literally being held captive by a child! A CHILD!” I repeated. “By the way, you look ridiculous!” I snorted at Simba.

“I look ridiculous…really?” Simba said and rolled his eyes so hard that I was certain they would fall right out of his head and onto the floor.

“Nevermind, get this off of me and let’s get out of here before she gets back!” I hissed.

I jumped out of the carriage, and Simba followed suit. The pink pyjamas tangled around my feet and I fell flat on my face. “Don’t even…” I said as I glared at Simba who was covering his mouth with both paws as he tried to force the laughter back down to his gut. He could tell by the look on my face that I wasn’t kidding.

“Hold still!” He commanded as he tugged on the zipper of the pink pyjamas. “It’s stuck.”

“What do you mean it’s stuck?” I said.

“I mean it’s stuck, your hair is stuck in between the teeth of the zipper; I can’t get it down!”

I started to panic. The only way I was getting out of these pyjamas was with the assistance of someone else. Amelia zipped me up so that the zipper was on my back and not in the front and there was no way I could reach it by myself.

“We need to get out of here!” Simba said as he slid the blue, frilly night gown over his head and tossed it into the corner. I knew he was trying to annoy me on purpose by doing this, but I ignored his feeble attempt at humour.

“And how do you suppose we do that? The door is shut, and we can’t reach the doorknob.” ¬†He was really starting to get under my skin.

“The window,” Simba said as he pointed to the sill. He jumped up gracefully, took out his sharpest claw and slashed an opening in the screen that we could both fit through.

“After you My Lady,” Simba said with a stupid grin plastered across his face.

“You shall address me properly…I am His Lordship or The Prince of Darkness,” I spat as I brushed a pink frill out of my face and headed for the window.

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Seabass’ Diary…Day 154…Not so Fast!

August 7, 2017-Amelia squealed with delight. She brought me over to a full-length mirror and said, “You’re such a pretty kitty!” ¬†I stared back at my reflection; I looked absolutely ridiculous and hated myself for letting her humiliate me this way.

She placed me into some sort of carriage that is used for human babies and shoved a pacifier in my mouth. I’m not going to lie; I didn’t hate it. She left me, and I watched as she waltzed across the room to capture Simba. Finally, it was his turn.

I watched as Amelia struggled to lift him because of his girth and chuckled inwardly at the stupid look plastered on his face; it was half terror, half repentance for laughing at me earlier.

While Amelia was distracted I looked around the room for the best possible exit; it would not be an easy escape, especially if we had to run right past her. Simba and I leaving separately was not an option; there was no way any one of us was getting left behind, it was just too dangerous. Who knew what Amelia was capable of? We’ve already seen what a monster she is, and that was a chance that I wasn’t willing to take.

Suddenly, as Amelia was lifting a sky blue princess dress over Simba’s arms and head, there was shouting from downstairs!

“Amelia! Time to go to Grandma’s!” the voice shouted from the bottom of the stairs. Our saviour! We would finally be free! My heart leaped out of my chest, and I could see the relief flood Simba’s face; soon this nightmare would be over!

“Coming mom!” Amelia shouted. She finished her work on Simba and looked at us menacingly and said, “You stay here kitties, I’ll be back soon.”

She plunked Simba down in the carriage with me and shut the bedroom door.

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Seabass’ Diary…Day 151…A Grave Mistake

July 10, 2017-My head pounded in my ears and my mouth went dry. Amelia was coming for us and there was nowhere for us to escape her clutches.

Simba’s head whipped from side to side as he tried to find a path of least resistance. Amelia stood in front of us and reached down just as Simba shouted,”Follow me!”

I did as he commanded. We ran as fast as our legs would carry us and we managed to slide through Amelia’s legs.

“Naughty kitties!” She screamed and the sound of her laughing maniacally behind us sent shivers up my spine.

“She’s gaining on us!” I shouted to Simba.

“Up here!” He yelled and we raced up the staircase to the upper level of the house.

I heard Amelia’s footsteps stomp up the stairs after us. She was hot on our trail and it would only be a matter of time before she caught us for good.

“This way!” I said and pointed to a dark room Simba in after me and we heard the door slam as we huddled under the bed and braced for the worst.

“Silly cats! You come out from under there!” Amelia was crouching on the floor in front of us. My lungs burned and my legs ached and I wanted to go back to the prison, I wanted to be anywhere but here!

Amelia reached for me first and managed to scoop me up from my hiding place.

We had made a grave mistake. We should have never entered her room.

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Seabass’ Diary…Day 149…Escape

June 19, 2017- “Quickly, there is no time!” Simba shouted as I scrunched my eyes together and waited for a second while they adjusted to the lack of light.

Simba’s chest heaved from the level of exertion we had just been through, “GO!” he yelled and pushed me down a sleek silver tunnel that was angled into a sharp drop. I hit the ground with a THUD and steadied myself at the bottom.

Simba followed right behind me, and when all of our feet hit the ground, he quickly gave orders.

“Help me push this! We need to barricade ourselves!” Simba commanded and started pushing a large wooden plank with all of his might. I got on the other end, and we¬†covered the opening of the pipe we had just slid down.

“That was close. This should hold them! ¬†Dog won’t fit, but if by chance Hugo decides to risk following us down the pipe, he won’t be able to slither back up. He’d be trapped until someone moved the pipe and who knows how long that would take.” Simba said.

I could sense a tiny bit of relief in his voice, but I was not relieved by any means. I was more afraid now than I had ever been. Something told me that we were not out of danger.

“Where are we?” I asked.

“We’re just at the end of the block…about four or five houses down from ours I think…in a basement,” he said.

“What?”

“We’re in somebody’s basement. It looks like they’re renovating and thankfully, it saved our lives,” Simba said.

“Whose house are we in?” I felt my breath shorten and my pulse quicken as I anticipated Simba’s answer.

“It was our only choice!” Simba said sternly, “I didn’t plan this!”

I swallowed hard and looked for an escape route. My voice caught in my throat when I realized that the only way out was up the staircase and through the central part of the house.

“Please tell me this isn’t her house,” I said and shuddered at the thought.

“It might very well be,” Simba said. “There is only one way to find out.”

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Seabass’ Diary…Day 145…Slither

May 22, 2017-I gulped at the sight of him. I gave my head a shake and remembered the advice that Simba had given me many years ago, during our first encounter with Hugo, he said, “Whatever you do, do not look him in the eye.” I blinked fast and tried to avoid eye contact. Rumour had it that Hugo’s eyes were mesmerizing, and I didn’t want to take a chance that they weren’t. After all, plenty of other animals had fallen under his spell by not heeding the warning and were led away to their untimely deaths.

“Hello SSSSSebassssstien,” he hissed.

He rocked his snake body back and forth and I could tell that he was positioning himself so that he could envelop me with his tail. If this happened he would quite literally either swallow me whole or squeeze me to death and then eat me. I did not want to experience either.

“We meet again,” I said disguising the fear in my voice. I took a few steps backward and released myself from the circle he had created around me.

“Yesssss! Where is SSSSSSimba?”

“I’m here. Don’t worry your hideous little face about it!” Simba sneered.

Hugo turned around and the sight of Simba made him smile.

“Now now, no need to be nassssssty.¬†I’ve sssssimply¬†come for sssssome help!” he hissed

“We don’t believe you,” Simba said. “Why should we, after everything you’ve done?”

Hugo chuckled, “Sssssso what? The passsst is in the passsst!”

I could tell that he was lying and by the look on Simba’s face, so could he.

“Tell us why you’re here,” I said. “Tell us why you’re here and we won’t harm you.”

“Now that’sssss¬†funny! You harm me? Ssssay it issssn’t¬†sssso!” he slithered.

“TELL US WHAT YOU WANT or I will not hesitate to tase you,” Simba said matter of factly. He was fearless and I admired his ability to stand his ground.

Hugo slithered around us again until we were both surrounded by his giant body. If he chose to squeeze us to death, there would be no escape.

“It’s my sssson, he’ssss¬†misssssing,” Hugo hissed.

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Seabass’ Diary…Day 140…Unsure

April 20, 2017- My guts churned as I realized the facts. The tall, thin woman missing from the group meant that she was still at large. I didn’t want to think about her on the loose, lurking around our neighbourhood, waiting for her next opportunity to cause chaos in our seemingly normal lives.

There were so many things I’d have to sort out; the new found power of Simba and what he was really capable of, getting Bernard back to his family, making sure that the prison was secured and not in imminent danger, among a laundry list of other things. I hated feeling this way; so unsure of what was to come and the feeling of not knowing who was really around me.

All of us except the small, stupid human were taken back to the prison in a police car. She was being taken to the hospital because of her injuries. The large, stupid human took Bernard back to Monty’s house where his family was waiting; I watched from the window of the prison as the large, stupid human explained the ordeal to Bernard’s parents. Thankfully they looked shocked and sympathetic and seemed happy that Bernard was safe.

“Sebastien, may I speak to you for a moment?” Simba asked. I half-heartedly turned around and expected a lecture.

“I’m glad we’re all safe, I’m glad that this didn’t turn out as a worst possible scenario,” he continued.

“I’m glad we’re back too,” I paused for a moment and wondered if I should say anything else. Before I got a chance Simba spoke, “There’s something I need to tell you.”

I gave him my full attention and sat in silence at the prospect of what he was about to say. I braced myself and held my breath.

“I’m not who you think I am.”

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Seabass’ Diary…Day 117…Help Us Please…

September 7, 2016-There I stood, nose to nose with a behemoth. I had never seen anything like this! It was some sort of canine yes, but not the kind I had ever come across and it definitely wasn’t Monty. I took a step backward, raised my hands in the air as if to surrender and slowly tried to move away. The huge animal shoved it’s nose into my belly and gave me the once over. He sniffed and snorted at me and I was covered in his slobber; it was absolutely disgusting! As soon as I figured out who this chap was I would send him my dry cleaning bill!

While he inspected me I looked behind him and saw an enormous bone…that’s what the sound must have been, his teeth scraping the scraps of meat off of it. ¬†The gigantic canine finally stopped sniffing me and I relaxed a little. “Is this Monty’s house?” I asked as Simba came out of the bushes and joined me. He must have figured it was safe now that the animal hadn’t made a meal out of me. “Yup it’s his house but he’s not here…who are you?” the canine asked suspiciously. “I’m Seabass and this is Simba,” I said pointing to him. “We really needed Monty’s help, when will he be back?” I asked. We were running out of time to find the small human and there had been no indication that the large human had received our message.

“Why do you need his help? I can help, what do you need help with?” he asked eagerly. “Our mother is missing,” Simba said, “Our human,” I clarified. “She has been kidnapped by a horrible man and we are afraid that we’ll never see her again-that’s why we needed Monty! We were going to have him track down her scent and lead us to her…before it’s too late,” I said. The canine paused for a moment then said, “I come from a long line of canines that help humans, my grandfather was a Saint Bernard Rescue Dog, he saved many lives in the Swiss Alps…I can help you find your human.”

Seabass’ Diary…Day 31…Missing…

April 30, 2016- I shook my head in amazement and it occurred to me that no matter what I did I would get¬†blamed for it. I thought about that for a moment…so if I was going to get blamed for something I didn’t do, I might as well do whatever I want anyway! Yes of course! From now on I would do what I want!

I glared at Monty and I’m sure that my hateful stare struck fear deep into his heart. He did not remember who he was messing with! I am an evil genius, ice water runs through my veins and there is nothing that I am not capable of! Perhaps the mutt needed a gentle reminder of his place in our prison-perhaps I would be just the one to teach him that he was lowest on the totem pole…even lower than the stupid humans as far as I was concerned.

Later that night the stupid humans settled in front of the idiot box with the mutt and ate some sort of popped corn…I particularly like this stuff-especially the butter like topping which I lick off the corn kernels when no one is watching. I had already done that to this particular serving and watched as the stupid humans consumed it by the handfuls. As I watched them gorge…the large, stupid one especially, I realized that I needed a plan. A plan to get rid of the mutt for good but I would need help for what I had in mind…I would have to recruit Simba. I looked around-usually he did not leave the small, stupid human’s side, they were inseparable…but he was not at his usual post. I rushed to his hiding spot and he was not there either…it seemed as though Simba was missing.

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Seabass’ Diary…Day 30…Outwitted for now

April 28, 2016-The footsteps drew nearer and I held my breath in anticipation. The lights flicked on and there stood both of the stupid humans.They looked at the nest and then at each other, the look on their faces told me that they were astounded with the vision in front of them.

The small, stupid human slowly approached the nest and paused. She looked at the sleeping mongrel and he opened his eyes. Monty gave her the saddest look I’ve ever seen, it was so sad that it was pathetic actually. This would never work on the small, stupid human even if she was a total idiot-she would see through his thinly veiled plan and punish him at any moment…I waited.

She sat down on the nest with him and stroked his coat gently. He lifted his head and nudged her, she embraced him and he gave her a disgusting, slobbery kiss. WHAT WAS HAPPENING?! My jaw hung open with amazement. Had I been outsmarted by a lesser species? No, this could not be possible! My eyes darted to the doorway and the large, stupid human was gone. I emerged from my hiding place and like a ninja, I crept into the doorway of the livingroom to see what he was doing; the large, stupid human was cleaning up the mess! He swept up the shattered glass and put the room back in order in complete silence.

The small, stupid human entered the living room with the mutt.She looked around for a moment as she surveyed the damage, she finally said quietly, “So what do you think happened here?” The large, stupid human turned to her and said, “Seabass happened…I have no doubt.”

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